Christmas Goose Stew

INGREDIENTS:
(This recipe can be altered easily to use two leftover ducks, and slightly less well with one leftover turkey. If turkey is used, try to select as much dark meat as possible.)

FOR THE STEW:
Leftover meat reserved from one roast Christmas goose
4 oz. bacon, diced
2 tbsp. flour
1 tbsp. butter
1 onion
4 garlic cloves, minced
4 cups of goose stock (see below)
1 tsp. dried thyme
2 dried bay leaves
1 tsp. Worchestershire sauce
2 tbsp. brown sugar
1/8 tsp. nutmeg
4 carrots, chopped on the bias
5 small Yukon gold or white potatoes, cubed
5 sprigs Italian parsley, chopped
Salt and pepper
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2 bottles Anchor Steam 2008 Christmas Ale

FOR THE STOCK:
1 goose carcass, picked fairly clean
1 onion, roughly chopped
2 carrots, roughly chopped
3 celery stalks, roughly chopped
2 garlic cloves, smashed
10 whole black peppercorns
4 springs fresh parsley
1 tsp. dried rosemary
1 tbsp dried thyme
2 dried bay leaves

1) Combine the goose carcass and all the stock ingredients, divided into two large pots if necessary. Fill pot(s) with water until the goose is just submerged. Bring to a boil and simmer for 1 1/2 hours covered, then continue to simmer for 1 1/2 hours uncovered. Strain stock through a colander into a large bowl and refrigerate overnight.
2) The next day, use a wide spoon to scrape the solid fat from the surface of the stock. (Reserve fat for other recipes--it's divine.) Stock may be somewhat gelatinous when cold. You will likely have more than the four cups needed for this recipe; freeze the remainder and save for other soups.
3) Place the diced bacon in a large soup pot or Dutch oven and set burner to medium-high. Cook until bacon is crisp and fat is rendered. Remove bacon to a paper towel-lined surface and turn off burner.
4) In a sauce pot, melt the butter over med-high heat until foaming subsides. Add the flour to the butter and stir quickly to form a roux. When the flour is a deep, nutty brown, slowly add a cup of the goose stock, whisking to form a liquid thickener. Turn off heat.
5) Return the bacon fat pot to heat and add the onion and garlic, cooking until translucent, about 3 minutes. Open one of the bottles of Anchor Steam Christmas Ale and pour it in, scraping any brown bits of bacon fond off the bottom of the pot with the liquid. Take the mixture of stock and roux and add to the pot, stirring constantly.
6) Add thyme, bay leaves, and the remaining goose stock. Bring to a boil. Cover and simmer for 40 minutes on low heat.
7) Uncover pot and add the Worchestershire, nutmeg, and sugar. Grind plenty of fresh black pepper, and add salt to taste.
8) Add potatoes and carrots and simmer the stew uncovered for about five minutes. Stir in the reserved goose meat and bacon and continue to cook until potatoes and carrots are tender. Garnish the stew with 3 tbsp. chopped Italian parsley.
9) Open the second bottle of Anchor Steam 2008 Christmas Ale.
10) Enjoy together.

THE BEER:
When you're using a beer to cook your meal, you can bet the same brew would pair well with the food. The Anchor 2008 is well-rounded and dark, the consistency of a porter, with hints of allspice, chocolatey malts, and sprucey hops. 'Tis the season to pair beer with goose! Huzzah!

THE ADVENTURE:

HOW TO PURCHASE A CHRISTMAS GOOSE:

1) Set the alarm for early Christmas morning.
2) Throw open bedroom window and stick head out.
3) Find an urchin. Shout down to him (or her) "What day is it?"
4) When the urchin replies, "Today? Why, today is Christmas Day!" throw the urchin a shilling and tell it to fetch a goose.
5) Await arrival of goose. When the urchin returns, don't forget to tip him or her for prompt service. (Note: this is the easiest way to procure a goose, and one of the most cost-effective. Recommended. If you live in a town without a large urchin population, see other options below.)

ALTERNATELY:

1) Go to the Upper West Side, to Fairway Market or Citarella.
2) Pay WAY too much money for a goose. (Put it on your credit card to get points. This will make you feel better.)
3) Carry goose home on the subway in a backpack.
(Note: this is simultaneously the most expensive and the most arduous way to purchase your Christmas goose. Not recommended.)

ALTERNATELY:

1) Find out where geese like to congregate nearest you. This could be the woods, Central Park, a nearby field, or even a friend's backyard.
2) Load rifle.
3) Shoot goose.
4) Pluck goose, then proceed with the roasting recipe of your choice.
(Note: this is the cheapest way to come by your Christmas goose, but it unfortunately involves the extra work of plucking and trimming the bird. It also requires that you possess accurate, steady aim.)

ALTERNATELY:

1) Get on the A train.
2) Go to Chinatown.
3) Ask for a goose. If they don't understand English, hold up the picture of the Christmas goose feast at the Cratchits' in your copy of A Christmas Carol. Point wildly at the image.
4) When the Chinese people still don't understand you, flap your arms at the elbow while turning in a circle. Honk vigorously.
5) After they have thrown you out, go to the next Chinese market down the block. Ask for two fresh ducks. Purchase ducks.
6) When you roast the birds on Christmas Day, post a guard at the entrance to the kitchen and allow no one inside. Plate the roast duck elegantly. When your friends exclaim, "It looks delicious! Is it duck?" smile benevolently and say, "There is nothing in the world as delicious as a slow-roasted Christmas goose."
(Note: this is an effective and inexpensive way to procure a Christmas goose. Be certain your kitchen guard can be trusted implicitly.)

ALTERNATELY:

1) Order take-out on Christmas Day. Tacos are nice. If you don't care for tacos, consider Beef with Snow Peas and Hot-and-Sour Soup.
2) Pay delivery man.
3) Eat take-out.
4) When asked how your Christmas dinner celebration went, and whether your goose was a success, adopt a dreamy expression and say, "There is nothing in the world as delicious as a slow-roasted Christmas goose."
(Note: this technique is fairly effortless, and lies in the lower range of cost. Recommended.)